The difference between a friend and a best friend is in what they say. The following should help you see the difference.
A Friend Says: Yeah, I will come bail you out.
A Best Friend Says: That was fun until they took away the lighter.
A Friend Says: She gave you herpes? Bitch!!
A Best Friend Says: Don't worry, I gave her crabs as revenge for you.
A Friend Says: I just got a blowjob.
A Best Friend Says: I just got 2 blowjobs. Want yours?
A Friend Says: I'm on my way.
A Best Friend Says: I'm here.
A Friend Says: Not the best haircut you ever got.
A Best Friend Says: Now we look like twins.
A Friend Says: Why would you use that much peanut butter?
A Best Friend Says: I'll be back, we need more peanut butter.
A Friend Says: I will never leave you.
A Best Friend Says: I never left you.
A Friend Says: That is impossible, it can't be done. But go ahead and try.
A Best Friend Says: Hold my beer while we try this.
Hope the differences are clear now.
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Sunday, May 04, 2008
Jibber Jabber
Well hello my little mental breakdowns.
How are we today?
I am well. I have had some special fun in store for us today.
First we are going to go to the old folks home and count the wrinkles. First one to get past a thousand wins a shiny new nickel.
Seeing as that should only take about 4 or 5 minutes, we will then go across the street to the park. For lunch, we will see what people feed us when we dress up like pigeons and warn them that if they dont feed us, we will poop on their heads!!
I then have an arts and crafts time period planned. We will go to the back alleys of stores downtown, pick up as many styrofoam containers as we can find and then, using our spit, we will glue them to parking meters. Then we will use all the noodles we find and try to pin them on all the men in business suits in the financial district.
Once that is done, we will come home by hitchhiking on buses and lying under taxi cabs.
Once you are all tuckered out from our day, we are going to rest on this nice piece of sandpaper that i was going to use for toilet paper.
Love you and remember, the only good friend, is a shaved friend.
How are we today?
I am well. I have had some special fun in store for us today.
First we are going to go to the old folks home and count the wrinkles. First one to get past a thousand wins a shiny new nickel.
Seeing as that should only take about 4 or 5 minutes, we will then go across the street to the park. For lunch, we will see what people feed us when we dress up like pigeons and warn them that if they dont feed us, we will poop on their heads!!
I then have an arts and crafts time period planned. We will go to the back alleys of stores downtown, pick up as many styrofoam containers as we can find and then, using our spit, we will glue them to parking meters. Then we will use all the noodles we find and try to pin them on all the men in business suits in the financial district.
Once that is done, we will come home by hitchhiking on buses and lying under taxi cabs.
Once you are all tuckered out from our day, we are going to rest on this nice piece of sandpaper that i was going to use for toilet paper.
Love you and remember, the only good friend, is a shaved friend.
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