Monday, January 19, 2009
Just A Thought
CHILI DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Monday, January 12, 2009
7 Different Types of Sex
Ok, we all love sex, but to keep you up to date, here they are:
1:Smurf Sex. This kind of sex happens when you first meet someone and you both have sex until you are blue in the face.
2:Kitchen Sex. This is when you have been with your partner for a short time and you are so horny you will have sex anywhere, even in the kitchen.
3:Bedroom Sex. This is when you have been with your partner for a long time. Your sex has gotten routine and you usually have sex only in your bedroom.
4:Hallway Sex. This is when you have been with your partner for too long. When you pass each other in the hallway you both say "screw you".
5:Courtroom Sex. This is when you cannot stand your wife any more. She takes you to court and screws you in front of everyone.
6:Welfare Sex. You get a little each month. But not enough to live on
7:Religious Sex, which means you get Nun in the>morning, Nun in the afternoon and Nun at night.
I hope this helps.
1:Smurf Sex. This kind of sex happens when you first meet someone and you both have sex until you are blue in the face.
2:Kitchen Sex. This is when you have been with your partner for a short time and you are so horny you will have sex anywhere, even in the kitchen.
3:Bedroom Sex. This is when you have been with your partner for a long time. Your sex has gotten routine and you usually have sex only in your bedroom.
4:Hallway Sex. This is when you have been with your partner for too long. When you pass each other in the hallway you both say "screw you".
5:Courtroom Sex. This is when you cannot stand your wife any more. She takes you to court and screws you in front of everyone.
6:Welfare Sex. You get a little each month. But not enough to live on
7:Religious Sex, which means you get Nun in the>morning, Nun in the afternoon and Nun at night.
I hope this helps.
Friday, January 09, 2009
The Meaning of Life - Revisited
Ok, so the meaning of life is known to be 42. But we still have not established what the question is.
Therefore, I hereby submit my alternative answer until we can establish what the question is.
The meaning of life is: Oh, why the fuck not!
That is my opinion. Sure, life is full of lemon's. So, when you get lemons, so what do you do? Sure, you can squeeze the juice into the eyes of the person who gave you the lemons and laugh your ass of at their pain. Or you can take those lemons, find someone with tequilla and do shots. (BODY SHOTS RULE!!!!!!!!!)
But all of life's greatest and worst moments start with that one simple phrase. "Oh, why the fuck not!"
JUST DO IT PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Kiss that cutie you have been meaning to tell smells nice!
Fart in the elevator and yell, "FUCK THAT WAS A TASTY BURRITO!!"!
Ask that cop, "You're eyes look glazed, you been eating donuts?"!
Wear your underwear on the outside of your pant and declare yourself a superhero!
Put on the dog suit and play in the dog park with the puppies!
Pull down your pants and slide on the ice!
Walk into the bank and yell, "THIS IS A DEPOSIT!!!"!
Take that trip!
See that lover!
Spank that monkey!
Choke that chicken!
Double click that mouse!
Dress up like Dracula, walk into the hospital and ask where the blood bank is!
Show them you are alive, cause isn't that what the meaning of life REALLY is?
Therefore, I hereby submit my alternative answer until we can establish what the question is.
The meaning of life is: Oh, why the fuck not!
That is my opinion. Sure, life is full of lemon's. So, when you get lemons, so what do you do? Sure, you can squeeze the juice into the eyes of the person who gave you the lemons and laugh your ass of at their pain. Or you can take those lemons, find someone with tequilla and do shots. (BODY SHOTS RULE!!!!!!!!!)
But all of life's greatest and worst moments start with that one simple phrase. "Oh, why the fuck not!"
JUST DO IT PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Kiss that cutie you have been meaning to tell smells nice!
Fart in the elevator and yell, "FUCK THAT WAS A TASTY BURRITO!!"!
Ask that cop, "You're eyes look glazed, you been eating donuts?"!
Wear your underwear on the outside of your pant and declare yourself a superhero!
Put on the dog suit and play in the dog park with the puppies!
Pull down your pants and slide on the ice!
Walk into the bank and yell, "THIS IS A DEPOSIT!!!"!
Take that trip!
See that lover!
Spank that monkey!
Choke that chicken!
Double click that mouse!
Dress up like Dracula, walk into the hospital and ask where the blood bank is!
Show them you are alive, cause isn't that what the meaning of life REALLY is?
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