Songs Finally Answered

I was informed that I did not answer the question "Will you still love me tomorrow?" on one of my previous blogs.

Shame on me. That is one of the biggest and earliest song questions ever asked.

The answer is simple.

Only if I remember tonight.

Got Another Question

So, who do you think would look better shaved.

Where?

That is up to you!!!!

Questions Finally Answered.

Who let the dogs out? - Droopy. He missed his friends.

Where have all the flowers gone? - Stupid question in the desert!!

Why does it all have to end? - Because then we would not have a reason for chick songs.

Who are you? - I refuse to answer on the grounds that I will be in big doo doo!!!!

Culture Time

I never wanted to do this job in the first place!
I... I wanted to be...

A LUMBERJACK!

(piano vamp)

Leaping from tree to tree! As they float down the mighty rivers of
British Columbia! With my best girl by my side!
The Larch!
The Pine!
The Giant Redwood tree!
The Sequoia!
The Little Whopping Rule Tree!
We'd sing! Sing! Sing!


Oh, I'm a lumberjack, and I'm okay,
I sleep all night and I work all day.

CHORUS: He's a lumberjack, and he's okay,
He sleeps all night and he works all day.

I cut down trees, I eat my lunch,
I go to the lava-try.
On Wednesdays I go shoppin'
And have buttered scones for tea.

Mounties: He cuts down trees, he eats his lunch,
He goes to the lava-try.
On Wednesdays 'e goes shoppin'
And has buttered scones for tea.

CHORUS

I cut down trees, I skip and jump,
I like to press wild flowers.
I put on women's clothing,
And hang around in bars.

Mounties: He cuts down trees, he skips and jumps,
He likes to press wild flowers.
He puts on women's clothing
And hangs around.... In bars???????

CHORUS

I chop down trees, I wear high heels,
Suspendies and a bra.
I wish I'd been a girlie
Just like my dear papa.

Mounties: He cuts down trees, he wears high heels
Suspendies?? and a .... a Bra????
(spoken, raggedly) What's this? Wants to be a *girlie*? Oh, My!
And I thought you were so rugged! Poofter!

CHORUS

What Is Wrong With People?

I have a Facebook account. I am having a poke-war with a few people. Hey, it is a fun way to keep in touch without having to have an actual message.

There is actually a group of people out there who say that poking is the same as fucking!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

C'mon folks. You are just giving someone a reminder that you are out there!!! Grow up!!!! If it the same as fucking, then I am the biggest slut on the planet!!!! And I might as well get the divorce papers done up, because, if I am doing all this poking/fucking then I am cheating on her with more partners than Homer Simpson has had donuts!!!!!

If it wasnt for the fact that there are some real nice people out there, I would let the penguins have you.

I Have Been Away Too Long

Hello sweetie. Did you miss me?

Come here and give me a kiss. Ohhhhh how I missed you. I am sorry to have been away for so long baby. I have been working and am just exhausted at the end of the day. Then the weekend comes and I am out all the time. I am so sorry to have neglected you.

I promise to return to you soon. I need to go to sleep. I promise to come back to you soon.

Good Night my little snugglypuff.

(There, now my blog should not be so upset that I have been away for so long)

A Typical Day

So I suffer from insomnia and had set my alarm for 6:20 this morning. I woke up at one point, look at the alarm clock and wonder why if the display is showing 6:22, why did it not go off. I turn to look at the PVR (kinda like a TiVo if there are any American readers, never mind any readers at all) and it is showing the time as 5:22.

It has happened sometimes that when setting the alarm, the clock moves ahead an hour, so no big deal. As I am reseting the clock, I also discover that in the long run it would not have mattered because, when setting the alarm time, I failed to turn the damn thing on in the first place. To top it all of, my brain said to my body, "You are getting up in only an hour, so why bother going back to sleep?"

I tried to fight it, but the birds (that discovered that there is a gap in the window thanks to some pre-installed ledging on the inside windowsill and have now built a nest under the air-conditioner inside my bedroom) just had some babies, so they decided it was time for a sing song.

So this is the first 20 minutes of my day. I flake on the couch to get away from the birds and then got picked up by a friend because I was borrowing her car for the day to help a friend of mine out.

Wanna guess how the rest of it went?